Whiskey and Cigar Aint For You, Babe
March 2, 2012Posted by on
Being an only child, I grew up with myself, also 1) a whole bunch of male cousins; 2) my grandparents. Buzz words: male; old.
I wonder whether this makes me more inclined to hang out with older dudes? This may sound SUPER sketchy, but being able to converse on big stuff, like economics, philosophy, and world, cynically, getting enlightened, over whiskey (gin and tonic for me) and cigar is just brilliant. I am not interested in sports, hopefully their testosterone level has gone down enough that they don’t care either, or they have just been so awesomely nerdy that they have never cared in their life. Young boys (which may actually be better) and older women and young women who possess whose unworldly qualities would DEFINITELY do too. Basically I just want some platonic and deep discussion with people that I look up to. Plato and Socrates would pat me on my back for having this aspiration.
It is really a product of social psychology, unfortunately. Stereotypes. Basically when I think of why I naturally buy this stupid stereotyping, I feel very unPC. Maybe our minds are still stuck in the down of women liberation, where women are still trying to break free, yet all higher space is dominated by male. Mentors are always male, and then we have protoges and protogees. You would think naturally when protogees grew up we would have mentress. Nope. What’s a mentress anyways? We are still living in an age where it is much easier for a woman to win a sexual harassment allegation against male boss than the other way around.
People, sexual harassment aint rape. We can talk about all the technicalities in a rape case and whether it’s possible for a man to get raped, but sexual harassment cases are different. We have an even playfield here. Well, only if women in power are sexy….
That will be my over-exposing-over-the-internet intro for today’s topic. Well, I don’t have much to say anymore….oh well.
So this interesting article showed on in my Corporette feeds today caught my eye. It is called Maybe It’s Not Just Dinner. It starts off by saying “It all boils down to sex”.
Oh how wonderful,buzz word, sex.Then the article goes on to make the following points (all references are in business context, such as “men” = “men in business”; and as usual, I exaggerate a lot; you are a fool if you think I am all serious)
- Men are very uptight these days. Try ask your male boss out for coffee and talk? Look into the mirror, don’t even think it’s possible unless you are, excuse my words, butt ugly. Easy to be misunderstood if you are at least decent looking. We are young, and we are cute.
- Men have some good reasons to be uptight, such as a) things happen; b) repercussions can be bad.
- Sex/money-power trade is still happening. Look left, look right, your male boss may slept with some subordinate, and your female boss may have been slept with (pardon my sexist language, we both benefit actually) to get where she is now.
I think we need to grow up, as a biological species. We like our romantic partners because 1) they are hot; 2) we like their personalities. And this is definitely over-simplifying things. Ideally your romantic partner is the optimized combination of all qualities you dig. So this colleague of opposite-gender, yah you are attracted to him/her, because he/she possesses some but not all qualities (including meeting at the right time) that you desire. so you dig them, but not as much.
I hope this is not difficult to understand. Emotions have layers, human relationships have layers. Acknowledge it, admit it. Of course, ideally humans would have standards too, but…ok this issue has layers. Basically, we would think it would be OK to just like someone as a friend/colleague, etc, right? In her previous post, It’s Just Dinner, Really, Chen clearly thought so. Forget about the shenanigans in Mad Men. That was 1965. But of course, who am i kidding. Not all souls are love-seeking souls. That’s why things do happen. Dirty nasty natural things. With layers of course.
Now everyone becomes suspects. But com’on, aren’t we all suspects in the world of love? 😛
Maybe the way to level the play field is: promote gay rights. Then we make more relationships suspicious. Then gossipers get tired.
But basically my idea of intellectual whiskey hours can be tossed out now.